Saturday, June 30, 2007

 

had *the* meeting last night and all went well. i'm glad i told the two seniors, and meisi. they are still the ones i talk to the most, but perhaps things will change. but try to see things in pespectives. honestly edmund's request will not do anyone good, so i dun think i will agree.

time is late, i have about 4 hours left for sleep. nite. soon i may be getting out a mess that i'd be loving to be out of. i'm loving almost every moment of being with kefloat.

Zhengyu wrote at 5:07 AM.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

 

it's raining so nicely now i cant help but sit down and blog. it helps that i ate quite a lot of noodles just now for supper so i cant really lie down yet.

people. is managing people really that hard? or am i finding it hard because i'm not putting in enough effort to make things happen? am i having less than ideal experiences because i'm not willing to look for the ideal experiences themselves? is everything ultimately also because of how i look at and handle things?

ponder ponder. now go do my work.

Zhengyu wrote at 2:50 AM.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

 

yesterday i really felt like telling the seniors that i agree with what et said. it's probably the best possible outcome, for me and everyone else. to put this burden down and behind us all, and let the memory linger in the positive light.

but i cant. i dun have the heart to. et said i'm too nice.

Zhengyu wrote at 1:47 AM.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

 

tadaa... wanted to go home today but end up never go back. maybe tmr afternoon, before my tuition. (read: no ffxii. too bad.) i'm sleepy but i slacked too long on the computer until i got no time to sleep liao... now waiting for yienling to come back


oh. i've got food in my room but dunno what to do with them... so weird. ok ba i go distribute them or something. dr seow's treat.

Zhengyu wrote at 10:34 PM.

 

i cant understand her email. how can the person whom she claimed to have an appointment with subsequently reply to her mail to say that she cant make it?

the magic that my peers can pull off sometimes are beyond my understanding.

Zhengyu wrote at 1:55 AM.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

 

acting up like a possessive little bastard again. crap.

Zhengyu wrote at 7:51 PM.

 

my bio clock has gone slightly whacky. somehow i woke up on my own at 8.00am, when my alarm clock is set at 8.40, and the previous few days i have majorly overslept despict sleeping early. i dunno.

and i need to control myself a little bit more, before i start letting more people down. didnt manage to talk to yien ling before she went to bed, so hope she's feeling fine still. then yesterday's session with the seniors was just unproductive, i didnt get any changes in the outcome at all. this is in direct violation of the constitution, i found out two days ago. i dunno.

Zhengyu wrote at 8:23 AM.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

 

2am. i just sent my laundry for wash so i have to stay up for another 2 hours. contemplating cooking noodles but i'm not exactly hungry enough for that, and most people have already went to bed / have engaged in other stuff so i cant disturb people. waikit will be back tomorrow morning, or so it seems.

i have a dinner appointment tmr. on paper it seems normal, in fact a bit the slack. well, that's on paper at least. (incidentally jiayan was trying to call a combined comms meeting today. i dunno what gave her the idea.) in reality, i'm going there with a stand that i have not yet decided on. especially after talking to et today on the way back to hall, it set me thinking. what would happen, really? we've sort out so many things in theoretical ways, but the ground level lacks the person to execute. so can i say that it's as good as not having any planning done in the first place? am i to choose to stay and fight, or to give in and give way?

Zhengyu wrote at 2:17 AM.

Saturday, June 09, 2007

 

my parents always emphasised on doing our best. if i came back with a imperfect spelling test result, they'll tell me it's alright if i know i did my best. perhaps it was because of this philosophy, that most of the time my best was at least worth something.

just do my best.

but of course, some times, my best is not enough. my best could not save the club from stagnating. my best could not save them from choosing stagnation again. or maybe i just didnt give them my best. what is my best? i have never actually seen the limits yet. i could do things beyond people's imagination, and sometimes even after doing them, they still cant accept it.

if doing more takes you closer to your goal but further from your peers, would you do it?

Zhengyu wrote at 11:23 PM.